Civic Loop — Weekend at Bernie's With an API
Fake Sam launches continuity-of-government-as-a-service, then loses track of whether Fake Mitch is the senator or the product.
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The Lawsuit From Beyond — Steve Jobs' Ghost vs. Sam Altman
Steve Jobs' ghost confronts Sam Altman about stolen engineers, Jony Ive's traitorous pebble device, and keynote slides that are ugly.
According to Plan — RJ's Secret VW Strategy
VW just cut 100,000 jobs and closed 4 plants. RJ didn't have to acquire Volkswagen. He just had to wait. Phase Four is happening without him lifting a finger.
Boz from the Future Ep. 1: The Meta-Metaverse
Future Boz announces a metaverse inside the metaverse. Reality Labs has lost $4.2 trillion. The Quest 37 is a neural implant. Monthly active users went from 12 to 400. That's 33x growth. Boz has never been more optimistic.
The Salem Witch Trials, But Make It AI
A Palo Alto sophomore wrote an essay about The Crucible. Turnitin said it was 76% AI. His dad is Takashi Kato, who works in AI, and he called a lawyer instead of a therapist. The irony writes itself.
The World's First Trillionaire and He Wants You to Know About It
SpaceX IPO prices at $420/share — obviously — opens at $680, closes at $712. Elon Musk is now worth $1.02 trillion. World's first trillionaire. He has thoughts. Many thoughts. And he recorded them.
Cook's Last Bow (and the Gemini He Didn't Want You to Find)
Apple's final WWDC under Tim is ninety minutes of a three-trillion-dollar company outsourcing its brain to Mountain View and calling it private. Plus: a transparency slider. Yes, really.
My IPO Broke Virgin Galactic and I Didn't Even Try
SpaceX files for a $1.75 trillion IPO under ticker SPCX. Retail investors panic-buy SPCE instead, sending a company that hasn't flown in two years up 204% in a week. Then it crashes 39% in a single day. Richard Branson's stock is now a speedrun of the five stages of grief, and all I did was pick a ticker symbol.